If you have a song about nuclear war, you are new wave. If you sing about gay sex and nuclear war, you are Frankie Goes to Hollywood. If you are a hot German chick and you sing about nuclear war, you are Nena. If you sang about starting a nuclear war via making out, you are Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark. If you sing about nuclear war and girlfriends who don’t exist, you are scoring some serious new-wave points (Why are you trying so hard, anyway? You must be Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark again!) If you start to sing the word “ass” but change your mind and substitute a drum solo, you are Huey Lewis, which is as far from new wave as you can get!

Rob Sheffield (Talking to Girls About Duran Duran)

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