There is only one honest type of relationship status: It’s Complicated.

Whether you’ve been married for decades, are recently single, or are involved in some sort of obtuse polyamorous love triangle, it’s important to understand that relationships—all relationships, intimate or otherwise—are inherently complicated. We are human beings, mixed bags of thoughts and emotions and actions, righteous liars and honest cheats, sinners and saints, walking contradictions, both the darkness and the light.

Ergo, there’re going to be times at which you disagree with your partner, argue with your friends, quarrel with the the guy in the cubicle next to yours. Such is life.

The key, then, is to work through complications with others, to find common ground, to change yourself if you’d like but never—ever—attempt to change someone else. Love and caring and respect don’t work that way. To love someone is to understand them, warts and all. You can provide guidance, but the people you love still have to steer their own boat.

Joshua Fields Millburn

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